Monday 15 September 2008

Origin of Man

This post is not so much about the origin of man in general, but the origin of a man in particular. My husband in fact. Besides being extremely nice to look at, he is often of debated origin. Or at least, strangers offer varied guesses of differing degrees of correctness of his origin. I've decided to present here a variety of the most common hypotheses and analyze the verisimilitude of each.


First, a member of Kayli's ward recently hypothesized that Leo was Middle Eastern. Now, at first perusal, this is might be rejected out of hand, due to the undeniable fact that Leo is indeed from Colombia. However, with closer scrutiny, we can conclude that this may not be entirely untrue.
To examine this premise, we must explore the very history of Colombia itself. Colombia was originally the home of various native tribes including, but not limited to: the Muiscas and Taironas. Hence, Leo very likely may be of such descent.

Scientifically speaking, in the pictures above, Leo seems very suited to said environment.

However, in 1536, Spanish conquistadors ventured into the heartland of Colombia and soon gain control. Thus Leo could also owe his descendancy to Spain. His ancestors having lived in Colombia for centuries would come to call themselves creoles, and we would have the example of Leo you see here, riding a fine Paso Fino of course.

Still another possibility that must not be overlooked is that Leo is in fact descended from a mixture of said Natives and Spanish conquistadors, being what is called a mestizo. In discord with any of these theories however, is the postulation proposed by many people that Leo is instead Italian. This is apparently taken from his name: Leonardo Latorre, namesake being the great Leonardo de Vinci, who was Italian. This theory gains credence when we see Leo in this fine Italian Armani suit. Obviously, he looks incredibly hot and appears to be born to wear it.

For certain, Leo is not of Scottish descent.

And we can conclude definitively that he not of German descent either.That would simply be sheer nonsense.

Going back to the original hypothesis of him being Middle Eastern, we can only surmise as follows. Perhaps, Leo's ancestors were indeed Italian and were among the Roman legionaries who conquered the Iberian peninsula, settled there, and soon began intermarrying with the natives of that region. When the Arabs next came in to conquer, they again intermarried with the local inhabitants resulting in Moorish/Spanish/Italian peoples who eventually sailed to Colombia. Again, those fearless adventurers intermarried with the Natives that lived there, resulting in the eventual birth of Leo. Thus we can conclude that Leo is indeed of Arab descent.

Of course, this picture is certainly proof enough.

6 comments:

Kayli said...

OH MY GOSH. You're right--that WAS the. most. awesome. post. EVER!

I love it I love it. Leo as a German boy is awesome. Also, love the last one. Okay, all of them. THey're all awesome.

Lynn said...

I love what you did with his photo! What a great post!
For some reason my computer wouldn't pick up a couple of the photos, including the German one. I would have loved to have seen that one, since I am of German decent. : D

Any way......AWESOME post!

Brooke said...

That was great Kami!!

Hanah said...

That was soo hilarious!! And soo awesome! My favorite was Leo in the headdress, and Leo as the German. :D LOL!! SOO awesome, and soo creative!! LOVED IT!

Megan said...

Kami - you are a born archeologist - who knew all that cultural history or cares???? Awesome post - cool photoshop!!! What did Leo think???

Natalie said...

I'm still laughing!